Mind/Matter

It's been over a week, so at some point, I've just got to decide to move on and stop thinking about it. Thanks to everyone for listening and for advice - I really appreciate both. Though for now I don't have plans to fly out, I'll keep you guys posted if that changes. I'm done being mad, frustrated, confused, hurted, disappointed. Just a little sad, but very, very grateful to have so many fantastic people in my life.

LSAT
Test on Saturday. AH!! Actually, I'm not really that worked up about it. Maybe I'm just been otherwise preoccupied, or just have written a bunch of standardized tests, or just don't really think I'll get into a law program. Anyway, whatever is suppose to happen, will happen.

Chapters
I really had no idea how much work goes into running such a seemingly relaxed place. I really like it though. I learned how to set up a display table today. Obviously, it's not rocket science. But it's really fun. I also got to decorate a wall/shelf with Halloweeny kids stuff. Feeling a little spooky? I'm going help run a Halloween program there too, on the Friday before.

G1
My cousin just got his G1, and so I took him driving around the neighbourhood when he got home from school. He is not bad at all, and surprisingly careful for a 16 year old guy. We even did traffic lights and a three point turn =)

For Fun

Michelle Kai was a Sweet Rocket Scientist in a past life. Discover your past lives @ Quiz Me

who would have thought?

Discover your Zodiac Personality @ Quiz Me

It's all gone to hell

What do you do when someone tells you that they have a brain disease, don't know how long they are going to live, but is refusing treatment , and want nothing to do with you, all because they love you? Do you respect what they want and wish them well, or do you keep banging your head against the brick wall of their resolve? And what if after a shouting match over the phone, they email to say they will always love you not even an hour after you say the worst goodbye in your life? What if they follow up with a text message that says that they love you and miss you at 3am in the morning?

Do you walk away to save your own sanity, and then wonder the rest of your life if there was more that you could have done? Do you fly out to try to sort this out, even though they expressedly said no? How do you keep from feeling angry, even though you know they are just trying to make you mad to get you to go away? How do you keep from feeling infinite sadness that there is nothing you can do for them? How do you convince them that they are worth loving, when they hate themself? How do you keep yourself from feeling guilty for wondering if any of what they said was true? Is it any wonder that you are now convinced that this summer was just a dream?