he booked a flight!

Oct 1 can't come fast enough for me! =)

pre-emptive reactions

I have discovered that I have this somewhat unnatural habit of, not just preparing for the worst and disappointment, but actually forcing myself to accept it as reality before it actually comes to be. Is this a defense mechanism against showing emotions when the outcome actually happens? Do I just want to be perceived as level-headed that I pre-emptively feel and react alone, so it will seem like I'm in control when it actually happens? But that's really bad, 'cuz then people think that things don't matter to me, when they really do. So much so that I don't want you to see how much.

Then, on those rare occasions that I was actually wrong, and the best things transpire; the joy is unparalleled.

I am discovering that I'm really as odd if not more than I ever thought I am.

another life

This is my sister's new puppy, Lia (short for Ophelia). I'm sure she'll have more pictures up at medori soon. I was visiting her new place yesterday, and shopping for housewarming gifts (microwave and shelves) for her, with her. And throughout all this, Rob was texting me. I can't help but daydream what life would be like if I were more content to be ordinary, and we both had a higher emotional quotient to know how a relationship works. Wouldn't it be fantastic if I could be living with him, with a new puppy, making money instead of going into debt for the next 3 years? I want to go to law school, but I also want to be with him. I know, I know, it'll all be worth it in a couple years. But will he be there in a couple years? And when all my professional dreams have come true, would it matter if I couldn't share that success with that person?