Last Day at Work!

In about 11 minutes, I'll be free!

Going to T.O. for the weekend before school starts again.

God is a Cornrolled Head

I had this dream last night, and it was a Bruce Willis a la 12 Monkey type thing. We were in the huge museum, with two reactor tanks of heavy water or whatever, and the idea is that there is a bomb (what else) in that water, and the whole place, with thousands of people, blows up when the specialists finally find out where the bomb is and tries to deactivate it. The thing is, it keeps blowing up, and every time we are returned to some earlier point in time, and the trick is to figure out where the bomb is sooner every time, and, you know, not blow anyone up.

I was there with my aunt and cousins, possibly my mom and grandmother, and I kept running straight to where the bomb is (it’s at the conductor’s stand in the concert hall), and seeing how it turns out. Everyone watches in tense anticipation for the divers to go into this heavy water tank, to deactivate the thing shaped like a giant black woman’s head with cornrolls. I guess we figure that there is no point is running, ‘cuz if the bomb goes off, we will all be dead anyway. So I’m pretty high up, and at the most intense moment, I threw a poker chip into the other tank (the one the divers weren’t in), and the crowd gasped and stared at me. But the divers went into the other tank to retrieve that chip, and then deactivated the bomb successfully this time. I believe it had to do with the timing and delay because they were retrieving my chip. The woman’s head thing rose out of the water, and somehow we knew it was God. The crisis is over, and people jumped into the heavy water tank to swim in jubilation. I hugged my cousin and said to the younger one, “Remember this day forever”.

I’ll let you draw your own conclusions as to how wacked my brain is.

The other day, I was biking and approaching a Don't Cross sign flashing (yeah, I was biking on the sidewalk), but when I zoomed into the intersection, the sign changed back to Green for Crossing. Ever since then I've been thinking that I have super powers.

What If PMS is Who We Really Are?

I know, I know. All summer I have been going through all these mood swings of discontentment with my life, and in particular with my boyfriend. I can’t seem to understand it, but if Cosmos says it’s PMS, who am I to question that? Then, a thought hit me today: What if that’s who I really am? The bitchy, jealous, conniving control-freak of a woman – what if that’s my true self? What if the real me only come out during those times of hormone-induced liberation from the everyday mask I try to keep hidden under? What if I’m like that prince from The Silver Chair (Narnian Chronicles, Book Six), who only remembers who he is outside the witch’s spell for one hour a day, at which time he is bound to the Silver Chair to keep him from escaping home? What if all that I am, unattractive though it may be, is what I am when I’m PMS-ing? How can you go through life like that, only being yourself a week a month??!!

I wish I'd listen to the Hitchhiker

In a spurt of productivity last night, we decided to work on our summer applications for next year. Now I'm terrified. The stats is that most big Bay Street firms receive about 700+ applications, interview 20 on each Ontario campus in October, and then invite about 40 for a second interview in November, to hire 10-15 students. The Vancouver firms get about 300+ app's each. Keep in mind, these are the biggest firms. Just Ontario schools have about, I don't know, 200 second year students each? Plus out of province ones. Anyway, I guess now is about as good a time to panic as any.

introspection only kills lysosomes

Today at work I was googling “Non-Traditional Law Careers”. I don’t know why. I’m never been one to deviate from the mainstream or go explore an alternative anything. Never skipped a step, never pulled any punches. Just a good, rule-abiding kid. Never been exceptional or singled out for advancement or development. Just normal.

The thing is, I would never not article,or use my law degree ‘in a variety of other fields”. Give me a break. I paid the bucks and did my time, I want every prestige and reward I can afford.

I looked at the McGill, Western and UT career services websites, and they say to do a ‘self-assessment’ to see where you might fit well. And as I think back, the things that I still define myself by are not that different than in high school. wtf? This is two degrees, a commission, and three cities later. I guess we all start developing our identifies in those turbulent teenage years. And there are things fundamental to us that do not change and blah, blah, blah. I still have faith that I will turn out to be who I’m meant to be, but maybe it’ll take longer than I thought if I haven’t grown all that much than from when I’m 17. Okay, I’d like to think I’m wiser now, and more experienced, and totally not like that frosh who is going to arrive on campus bright-eyed bushy-tailed in 3 weeks, and of course I am sure that I am not that person anymore, but who am I now? I’ve still got two more years of school to go. I like school, but maybe that’s ‘cuz I don’t know anything different, and boring summer experiences are not an indication of anything. I think I can do well in law. I just want to start doing it now. Or never, if that'd not what I'm suppose to be doing.

talk with dad

My mom called my dad a couple days ago, and found out that my grandmother (in Shanghai) has been in and out of the hospital for the past month. She's over 90, and she's not lucid anymore. My dad says he's been working 24 hours a day for the past 6 weeks, because she is sick. It's sad and disheartening, but mostly my mom was disappointed and a little mad that my dad didn't bother to call to tell her that she's been sick. Anyway, that aside, my grandmother is in a seniors' home now. And as much as possible, I try to leave my parents' issues theirs alone.

Had a really good conversation with my dad though. We almost didn't speak for a year after I made the decision to go to law school. Not really by design, we just don't talk much, and I've avoided even those few opportunities that have presented themselves. Anyway, he asked about my studies and work and life, and I told him a little about course selection and my boyfriend, so it was a good start. I know this sounds ridiculous, but interacting with my dad is a little like interacting with an ex for me. I'd send emails, and won't get any responses; but when he does talk to me, I'm all excited and blogging about it. No wonder my social skills with the opposite sex is wacked.

for a good smoothie

Finally got the blender I wanted:
I have searched high and low, and compared prices, and such, but as luck would have it, the one that I wanted (this one), went on clearance price for $49.93, from $99.93. So I finally have one, right in time for this nasty heat wave. It also comes with a chrome jug, presumably for ice crushing. Very cool.

I am taking this Thursday and Friday off for a seminar in Toronto called Preparing to Practice in the Vancouver Bar. Then it's long weekend, so another mini-vacation for me. Then when I come back, it'll just be three weeks 'til school starts. Can't wait. I've got two part-time jobs for the fall, maybe another if I take on cadets again. We shall see.

My boyfriend's parents put up this mesh around our balconey for us, to keep out the pigeons, so now it looks like we live in a birdcage. What's worse, the little buggers still find a way to get in, but have no idea how to get out now. I've duct-taped everything I can reach, so hopefully I won't be coming back to starved bird carcass next Monday.